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Journal of vivness (1898)
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vivness (1898)
vivness
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Sunday January 06, 08
12:32 PM - i hate my "father"
Well I'm 13 years old. I hate my "father" a lot. I know a lot of people just say that but deep inside they do love their dads but I really don't.

I'm asian but I can't speak chinese. My "father" is really strict about everything. He hates the fact that I'm not the ideal daughter (which is just the traditional submissive daughter). Nothing I do is EVER going to be good enough for him. If i get an A for an assignment it's still not good enough for him because I have to be smarted then everyone else. I go to a private school and it's really difficult for me to compete with other people.

My "father" wants me to learn chinese. I refuse to because it takes up time in my life to do stuff at my normal school which he wants me to do better in and if i have more homework to learn chinese how can i do better at school? I find him so unreasonable. He says that I'm a useless piece of shit and a waste of money.

He and the rest of his family which includes my grandparents on his side hate me because I was born a girl and that I won't carry the family name when I get married. It frustrates me because it's not my fault!

I love my mum. She's the most caring person I know. She listens to me when I have something to say but I know she'll always pick him over me because she really doesn't have a choice. She tries to hold our family together and I just love her.

I wish I was 18 and could move out. But I'm not, and I have to live with him for at least another 5 years of my life. I always get into fights with him about my life and where I'm going with it. I don't know, I'm 13! Everytime we fight I always end up in my bed crying my eyes out because I can't deal with it any other way. He always threatens me. I'm worried that the relationship i have with my dad is going to effect my little brother. He's the most lovable thing ever and whenever my dad and I have a fight he makes me feel better. I just hope he turns out ok. User Journal

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